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I wish I had started counting from the very first time, but I didn't know that I would want to keep track of how many times in my life I will come out as gay. I'm not sure if I would know how to count all of them, and if I would consider unofficial happenings and social introductions mini-come-outs. Sometimes, I come out and I don't even realize I am coming out. Most times, I am totally aware of my surroundings enough to know if I am safe or not to come out, a skill that is necessary for survival.
I would introduce myself as a pansexual, cis-woman but I throw a little gender fluidity in there and I lean lesbian. That's just me! I am more than positive that every single person on this planet is a combination of the LGBTQ+. According to Amnesty International, the number of people born intersex is comparable to the number of red heads on the planet. I don't know about you, but I know a good amount of red heads, yet I have never met someone who has identified as intersex. I doubt this is because I have never met someone intersex and has more to do with the stigma and difficulty assessing the safety of the environment.
The LGBTQ+ community comes out regularly, and while is may be more acceptable today, this is still a difficult decision for transpeople because even gay people are transphobic -- ain't that some shit!?! Whenever a person decides to not disclose their identity, it is usually due to safety and comfort and we will always err on the side of caution because this could be life or death. This is ongoing, and it something that is considered when traveling domestically and internationally. 71 countries, a little less than a third of the countries, on Earth still criminalize being LGBTQ+, with anywhere from three years in prison to 100 lashes to the death penalty.
People who identify as "cis" or "straight" or even utter the words, "I identify as..." or "I use the pronouns..." signals to people like me that I am safe. When people in the LGBTQ+ community hear these words or phrases, it is as though you are waving a rainbow flag to us. If you are cis or straight, or both, then you identifying as such when you are out isn't for you, but for your fellow LGBTQ+ friends. Don't worry about sucking up the air or room or mocking us because it's quite the opposite. An ode to everyone coming out! This is like you verbally taking a walk in our gay shoes, and for those that start identifying after this reading this article, do me a favor, okay? Start counting and let me know how often in a particular timeframe (week/month/year/etc.). I'm just curious... #IdentifyYourself #Safety #ComingOut #AnOde #HopeToHelp #Equality #ThankYou #AppreciateAnAlly